“Honesty...The
best policy?”
Making
the choice between “The One” and living in deception...
So my best friend had
an affair while on holiday. Being rung up from a foreign country in a
state of self horror and disgust at four in the morning (who doesn’t
love time distances?) to be told of this fantastic news wasn’t the
highlight of my week.
They've been together
for about 6 months and have spent 99% of that time in each others
pockets. That's a lot more concentrated time than I could ever spend
with him and as a best friend, that's quite a confession! So surely
something that strong would be able to survive the work of some
foreign....lady, shall we say.
So my main question
was…do I convince him to tell his unsuspecting girlfriend? Or leave
him to sit under a blanket in despair with himself? Personally, I
would have left him under the blanket, after all it is what he
deserves. However, having a conscience does have its
downsides...doesn't his girlfriend deserve to know of his betrayal?
At least this way she can have her own choice of how to deal with the
arsehole. Which he should be thankful for, if it was me, he would be
gone. Forever.
Realistically, running
into the same girl from oh so exotic Mykonos in South London, likely?
Not so much. So its not as if she
would ever find out if he didn't let on...but a relationship of
deceit? Isn't that what all of the 90's chick flicks were warning us
away from? And eventually he would crack and she would find out
anyway...if it was me, I would prefer to know now rather than later.
His
girlfriend is funny, smart, beautiful...I don't understand what could
have possessed him to do this. So if she can't 'hold on to him', so
to speak, what hope do the rest of us have? According to some
surveys, not much hope! Apparently 5% of people have an affair on
holiday. But also apparently 100% unforgivable. Not that I would go
against this statistic.
After
a lot of table turning and Jesus, some interesting role play, he took
my advice above everyone else's and told her...To say things went
downhill from this point could be seen as an understatement.
Ultimately, she left a broken man in a heap on the floor. Unbearable.
I
do believe that ignorance is bliss. But also that you can't escape
from the inevitable. Eventually, the pain she feels will fade. And
all will be forgotten and hopefully forgiven! And they'll be left
with a stronger bond and the memory of how living without each other
never worked.
So
is honesty the best policy? Yes...well for now anyway.
